I like it when my friends exhibit a need for supervision equal to that of my own

So far my track record for my 27th year is less than entirely impressive.

I am ill. Boo.

I mean, I guess my idea of spending a week and a half sleeping 'til noon (or later) most days, drinking beer most nights, wearing heels one of those nights, watching lots of movies and TV, eating ice cream, pie, cake, and um, a celery stick that whoops, I didn't even finish*...

...maybe not the best equation for health.

I also ate some bananas, a thing of yogurt, and a BLT (lettuce! tomato! bacon...) and a BT (yeah, I lost the lettuce on sandwich number two)...

Okay so not a lot of big news here. Bailey's not acting healthy, surprise. Never mind that my 25-year-old self was running approximately five days a week.

I had a point. I really did. I thought I did.

Oh yeah! I was gonna tell you guys about my awesome friend Caleb.

He's a dancer in LA so I hardly ever get to see him anymore, but I got to see him yesterday on my birthday, and it was a TREAT with a capital T, R, E, A, annnd T.

Our visit was brief, but I'll take what I can get when it comes to this adorable, amazingly kind person, and during our time together he told us that as a child he used to eat

glitter.

As you can imagine, this piece of information lit up my birthday with extra joy. Kind of like some actual glitter could have done too, had someone thrown a handful of it into the living room air where we were laughing about Caleb's childhood antics.

He told us how his throat used to get so dry from eating it.

Oh my goodness, I love him so much, I can hardly write this without wanting him to just keep talking about it.

My mom came in the room after he had made this confession that, being so unabashed, makes "confession" not the correct term, and I immediately announced to her,

"Caleb used to eat glitter!"

Mom, who plays the introvert part well but occasionally surprises people with a zinger of a talent such as her fantastic billiards or bowling skills, or

THE ABILITY TO TWIRL FIRE BATONS!,**

replied instantly: "I used to eat paper" and kept walking.

I used to eat glue, but I think 85% of us did, and why's it even worth mentioning since Caleb was so much cooler and went straight for the glitter?

*Commitment issues?

**Yeah, no big deal. She birthed me.