Thursday, April 18, 2019

A meditation/pep talk/reflection/breath for today

 
There are a lot of things that need to be done. They’ll get done. And if they don’t, the world is going to keep on spinning. You’re not going to lose your job, your friends, the love of your kids. It will all still be there tomorrow. In fact, I bet you’ll find it later today. Just sip that coffee and take a breath – really feel it balloon in your chest then spill out from your nose – and recognize that though the preferred lack of stress may not be here in this moment, it will return in time.
 
That’s the thing about a day – it changes a million times. Morphs from a rush of deadlines to a sudden drink of lemonade on the porch. Then you’re chasing a tot in a diaper, next thing you know you’re watching him sleep on the baby monitor. I used to deem it a weakness – an extreme weakness – that I could have so many feelings in one day. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME? was the only way I could greet the reality, like a party guest I didn’t invite so why are they still here??
With a therapist explaining over and over that my person is normal, and working together with her to cope with and address my many emotions, I truly am able to calmly live with the fact that this is just how it is. We go through a lot of thoughts and feelings in a short amount of time. Our brains are super complex and impressive, honestly why should we be surprised that they’re capable of shuffling through moods and reactions like they’re feverishly looking for a number in a Rolodex?
So I guess that’s a secret that life in general never tells us – there’s going to be a lot of shifting. From happy to sad, angry to jealous, bored to overwhelmed, anxious to lost. And when you can’t take any more of the Ferris wheel ride, they send you back up for another nauseating loop.
But there’s another secret that takes longer to discover: we recover.
A hundred times a day we recover. Think how many things you’ve overcome this morning already. Got toothpaste on your shirt? I bet you changed it before running out the door, or you realized that you’re going to be OK smelling just a little bit minty fresh today. Kids had a meltdown before school? Bet they’re fine now. Discovered you were out of coffee at home? Bet you snuck into Starbucks to remedy that.
What, you still haven’t had your coffee? Are you crazy?! Go! Now! Stop reading this and get a cuppa!
J
What I’m trying to say with all this is that you’re totally fine, Friends. And if you’re not fine in this moment, you’re gonna be fine in one of the next several moments. There are so many ways to reset an annoyance, a frustrated attitude; so many healers inside your head ready to rescue you from that fear that just washed over you.  
My tiny practical recommendations? Drink some water, get outside (just sit, for five minutes), make a list, hug someone you love, text something honest, close your eyes for a few seconds. Turn on classical music or silly 90s music or Motown. Always Motown.
And then? Psych yourself out. Pretend you believe that you’ve got this, that the pain is going to correct its course and head back toward peace. Find one thing to look forward to, even if it’s the shipment of brightly colored Post-It notes arriving at the office today. Hold onto the blessings around you, and if you can’t touch them just yet, make sure you’re in a reaching formation so you’ll catch them when they come near.
Reeeeeeeeeeeeach.
Open up your chest, to possibility, to change, to trust. Feel that? That’s hope pouring in, filling in the little crevices that were crowded with crud. In reaching you’ve made space; you’ve stretched apart the grievances that were grinding together making everything feel ouchy. Now the balm of ice cream and giggles and tenderness can have a turn in that bounce house of a brain you’ve got.
You. Have. Got this.  
You. Are. Beautiful.  
In all your overthinking and panicking and worry you are finding room for a different train of thought. A train headed for the prairie, golden light filtering through the window to brush your forehead as you watch city melt into fields of wheat.  
Hear that? That’s the whistle humming you to rest, Baby. Listen to her love, echoing off the air and dancing for miles ahead.  

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