I'm a Grumpy Gills this morning.
Have been all week.
Seriously, everything bothers me. Even nothing irks me. Nothing of grumpy significance could be happening, and I've just been a little whiner growler grr grr grr.
My lower back has been hurting for a couple of weeks.
I don't know if I can blame PMS for this grumpiness, and that in itself makes me grumpy.
I've lost what seemed to be my can't-stop-it train of Christmas cheer.
I'm not thrilled that it's Saturday, and I'm usually thrilled for the weekend.
My space is a mess, and I'm too cranky and tired to do anything about it.
My previously scheduled 4 miles on the treadmill would do me a world of good, but truth be told, I don't think I'm going to don a sports bra today.
The only thing I know to do now (except avoid people so I don't leak my angst into their vulnerable, unmarred pores) is make a list. You know the kind. A gratitude list. So that I can maybe become a Gratitude Gills this morning and not waste the day tending to a bad mood.
So here we go.
1. The Bengay is working on my back.
2. The cat and I have run of the apartment for a few hours.
3. When I was stifled in my bad moodiness last night, Alex tickled me and then bought me a sandwich, then patiently sifted through the bottles of Chardonnay at the party we attended to get me the drink I wanted.
4. Alex thinks I'm funny (though, separate issue: he thinks he's funnier).
5. The coffee Abby made smells of wintry spices.
6. I got to spend three hours last night with six toddling babes, each ridiculously charming in their own right. (I have selected my fave, but so as not to make the other babies and parents feel bad, I won't name him -- err, I mean her -- here).
7. Though my back and knee and foot have issues, I am still able to walk, and run.
8. I love my new church.
9. That church is a mere mile from my home, making it much less tempting to sleep in and miss the happiness on Sunday morns.
10. While my room is a mess, if I look at it from the right angle, I have a great canvas to work with, if cleaning is my aim. And oh how good a clean room feels. Frees the spirit, doesn't it?
11. Pandora continues to introduce me to great tunes and artists.
(I took a break to look at Facebook, and the rampant opinions got me feeling feisty again, but I will soldier on with this list!)
12. Did I mention I have run of the apartment right now? I love my roomie, but I'm not good company right now, so for her sake and mine, I think this solo arrangement is good for the moment.
13. I got the cutest Christmas sign decoration thing, for one whole dollar.
14. Maybe I'll go to Panera for lunch. Mmmmm
15. My brother has begun making his annual batch of Christmas cookies.
16. Last night's party was more fun than I expected it to be, and the people I talked to were especially pleasant.
17. I also got to have an in-depth conversation with the party's hostess about various types of craft glue, and if you know me, this kind of thing is my jam.
18. Mmm, jam. Grateful for jam, I am.
19. I can send my bestie Nick angsty texts and sarcastic emails when I'm not wanting to interact with the world.
20. This week I had the courage to sing in front of my entire company (approx. 500 people) and I won $100 for it. (The applause and the experience were the true prize).
21. I have some pretty baller Christmas gifts to hand out this year, and I'm excited to see the recipients' faces when I distribute them.
22. I GET TO SEE MY NIECE AND NEPHEW FOR CHRISTMAS!!!!!
23. AND IT'S A SURPRISE, WHICH MAKES IT EXTRA FUN AND EXCITING!!!!
24. Grateful for my sister-in-law's parents, who robustly welcome me into their home for the holidays, while most of my nuclear family is 2,000 miles away.
25. DIY stuff. Crafty stuff. Crafting.
OK, I'm feeling a little better. I don't know if I'm going to craft, or clean, or drag myself to the gym, but we'll see.
Thanks for listening to Grumpy Gills. Here's hoping for a more Gratitude Gills day.